https://larahogan.me/blog/bring-solutions-not-problems/
There are PLENTY of reasons why a leader can’t or won’t listen to you on this issue, or care about it. And the reasons can change for that leader, or overlap, at any given moment! For example:
- You’re annoying them. Maybe it’s your tone, words, timing, how they generally perceive you, how often you ask, etc. Regardless: you’re annoying them.
- They’re not experienced or adept at tackling this kind of issue. They’ve got expertise in other areas, but not this one.
- They’re overloaded. They’re burned out, they work 12-hour days, they’ve already got a pile of work they need to focus on.
- This isn’t a priority for them, the team, or the company.
- You’ve amygdala hijacked them. Beyond just annoying them, you’ve straight-up triggered their fight or flight response, and their logical/rational brain is on standby right now.
What if you’re a leader and you desperately want to tell someone to “bring solutions, not problems”?
No matter the reason why you want to say this—you’re frustrated, you don’t care, you’re overloaded, you want them to change their approach—just ask an open question instead.
Steal one of these:
- What could we try?
- If you could wave a magic wand, what one thing would you change?
- What, deep-down, do you truly want?
- What do you need?
- What’s in the way?
- What’s holding you back?